Are you singing and identifying with the words to George Strait’s “I know she still loves me, but I don’t think she likes me anymore”? Then it is time to unleash the creative romantic within and bring back lost love.

Now don’t start with the old tired excuses of “I don’t have the time” or “I don’t know how” because that’s all they really are – excuses.  It doesn’t always take a lot of time or imagination. It really is the small things, like an unexpected little kiss on the nape of the neck or those crazy little titles of endearment like dear or love, that have the furthest stretch for their cost.

Do you know the definitions for creative and romantic? Creative is simply having the ability or power to create and romantic is relating to romance, which is simply a love affair. So even if you create a mess while trying to be sweet, it’ll work in your favor as the adage “it’s the thought that counts” really does apply.

All right, so now you get that you can do this, but need a few ideas to springboard from. Well, candy and roses are the traditional “romantic” gifts, but sometimes it just isn’t quite what you’re looking for. Next time, try getting flowers that have petals (pick some wildflowers for extra credit) and playing “He loves me, he loves me not”. Before handing the flowers over, you may want to count the petals and make sure there is an odd number so you don’t have the wrong ending.

Want to get crafty? No worries, no skill required. Do you remember what the symbol for infinity (never ending) looks like? It is shaped similar to a skinny eight lying on its side. Take a piece of ribbon or paper or whatever you can find and write the words “I love you forever” up and down both sides. Connect the ends together with a piece of tape or staples or what have you to form a loop. Connect the loop in the middle and twist to form a figure eight. Now you have a symbol to portray your undying love.

Sometimes all that is missing is the mood. Oh no, there’s a power outage! (Do you tell your love it was man created? I’ll let you decide.) What are you to do, just sitting there in the dark with nothing to distract you? I think you can take it from here.

So see, it’s not that hard and a romantic gift isn’t always material or expensive. Grab your love and dance to the radio, especially if it’s that special song. If you don’t have a special song, get one. Songs and poetry are the long time favorites of hopeless romantics. These few ideas should help get the creative juices flowing, so get busy and bring back lost love.

Is your marriage in danger of falling apart? Then it is time to take action and bring back lost love. I know…easier said than done, but not impossible. Things will go much smoother and faster if both you and your wife are attempting to maintain the marriage and get things back to where you want them, though not a necessity. If you put forth the effort, you’ll see the love return and she’ll get on board.

One factor in helping a man bring back lost love is the ability to adopt some good habits and virtues and throw out those that should be in the trash.

Starting with a foundation of true love will help you get quite far. Most, if not all, women want their husband to be loving, caring, and romantic – qualities that should all come easily if you have that foundation. Try the little unexpected kiss on the back of the neck, dedicated song, or surprise lunch. The little things that bring back lost love don’t require money and are usually the most treasured.

An important factor in any relationship, marriage or not, is good communication. It is necessary in all walks of life. Remember good communication requires LISTENING. So keep that in mind and try to understand her feelings or what she thinks may or may not be a problem. You don’t have to agree, but you should definitely hear each other out.

Maybe things have just become boring. Plan a little unexpected outing or vacation; surprise her with it.  If she doesn’t have to do the planning, her stress level will be greatly reduced and she’ll be free to enjoy this little unexpected gift.

Another nugget, which is actually quite large in being able to not only bring back lost love but maintain it, is faith and trust. Your wife should know without a doubt that she can trust you with her love, her soul, and her life.  That’s all she really wants. Her faith plays a major role in determining the highs and lows of love she feels for you.

This really goes without saying, but don’t wander astray, and if you already have, stop the behavior now and apologize to her. If you need help with this, check out the “Get Help Now” section of this site.

If you have been abusive, physically or emotionally, you really have your work cut out. She no longer has that faith or trust in you. It has been replaced with fear.  If you haven’t already done so, please seek out counseling through a pastor, a trusted friend, or an agency. You have to fix you before you can fix your marriage.

Another big turn off is undeserving jealousy. Be proud of her personal, professional, or whatever accomplishments. Support and help her in all these areas. For a woman, love is usually shown through your actions rather than your words, and the more you give, the more you receive.

If you have been working to bring back lost love, but do not feel as though you are making progress, don’t be afraid to get help. A trusted friend or family member may just hold the key you need. Maybe the two of you need a mediator to help you understand your differences and problems. If that’s the case, marriage counseling could be beneficial. In some unfortunate circumstances, a short separation may be needed to let both parties relax and put things in perspective.

Just do not give up. Taking positive action and being patient can prove to be successful steps in your quest to bring back lost love and save your marriage.

Did you just experience a breakup?  Are you wondering how to bring back lost love?  Most everyone has experienced this at some point, but give up without trying because they do not know how to rekindle the relationship.  However if you are over playing the victim and are ready to learn and willing to put some work into it, then you can bring back lost love.

First you must determine exactly what happened to cause the breakup in the first place.  You can’t go back and change what happened, but you can learn more about yourself and your love from those circumstances and grow from them. Maybe the breakup was due to a single event or maybe it was a conglomeration of behaviors that your ex just could not deal with anymore. No matter what the reasons are, you need to get down to the nitty gritty so you can deal with the situation now before it rears it’s ugly little head again.

Next, if you want to bring back lost love, don’t come off as a needy person.  I know you probably feel like you can’t live without your ex, but there isn’t any need in making it obvious.  Instead, stay strong.  Self-confidence (not arrogance) is a great mood-lifter and turn on.  Let your ex see the person you were when you two first fell in love.

Time for a MAJOR DON’T. Trying to be vengeful or make your ex jealous is not going to help you bring back lost love.  It is possibly one of the worse things you can do because it says, “I don’t’ need you. I’ve already moved on.”  While you do want your ex to see that you’re doing okay, you do not want them inspired to move on if your ideal scenario is to get back together.

Are you consumed with thoughts of how to bring back lost love? Do you feel heartbroken and hopeless? Going through a breakup, separation, or divorce, especially one that is unwanted, can be quite stressful and overwhelming, leaving you confused and desperate. But there is good news; with the right plan, or roadmap, nearly every relationship can be saved.

Sadly, many in this type of situation forget to think with their heads, allowing their emotions to rule their actions, and go off on a half-cocked so-called plan, and end up doing further damage. This is not a time to “fly by the seat of your pants.” If you are serious about being able to bring back lost love, then you need a competent, proven system that can make all the difference.

When trying to bring back lost love, you need a roadmap to success. As you know, a roadmap is simply a set of guidelines, instructions, plans, or explanations to help you to achieve some goal, in this case, saving your relationship. You need to be able to understand the underlying motivations, issues, and actions that all play into the causation of the breakup and prospect of getting back together. You need to know what pursuits to take, how to go about it, and possibly most importantly, when to do it.

Your first three steps are:

1. Don’t panic, you don’t want to do anything foolish and push them away;
2. Be agreeable to the breakup, just for now, again so you don’t cause any extra rift; and
3. Write a short loving note apologizing and letting your ex know that you aren’t going to be pushy

Restoration is the actual step of reconciling or renewing your marriage. If you have wisely worked your way through the other steps to marriage separation reconciliation (repentance, restructuring, and reporting) then restoration should be a breeze since you have actually already begun a new relationship with your spouse in whom you have better communication, more honesty, and a desire to please.

Just remember that communication is always the key element. Make sure you are both ready for this next step and take it in stride. Do not try to move too slow or too fast, but let things flow naturally. The two of you should sit down and decide on any rules or guidelines you want to move by and then stick to them, unless of course they just are not working. If that is the case, have another discussion and find another solution. Just keep working, together, and everything will fall into place.

Once precaution to keep in mind is that once you have completed this step, do not start thinking your work is over and slide back into your pre-separation ways. Marriage has ongoing upkeep that must be maintained in order to stay alive. A few things you can do to keep the fire lit are:

• Keep your marriage at the top of your priority list. Remember all that you have just gone through and nearly lost. Cherish your marriage and your love and do what you can to ensure its greatness.

• Communicate, communicate, communicate! Do not just assume (you probably know the old adage about that one) anything. Always talk things over, no matter how small or petty it may seem to you. That trivial little nugget may hold great weight with your spouse.

• Little surprises – even the old standby, “I just called to say I love you”, will let your spouse know you are thinking of them and lighten their heart, especially if they happen to be having a particularly trying time.

These few things are just the tip of the iceberg. Anything you can do that makes your spouse’s life easier or more enjoyable will most likely be returned to you a hundredfold. As long as you communicate, work as a partnership, and are completely committed to each other you can and will complete the steps to marriage separation reconciliation.

Note:

This article is Part 5 of 5.  Please click on the tag steps to marriage separation reconciliation for the full series.

Reporting is simply accountability. Accountability goes a long way when taking steps to marriage separation reconciliation as being accountable to your spouse helps build trust and communication ties that may have been weakened or lost entirely.

Reporting keeps you accountable by proving that you are both on the same wavelength and working towards the same goal. It lends an atmosphere of openness and acceptance so that it is easier to work together and be honest about what is or is not working and how things should be changed. Then last, but definitely not least, reporting proves that you are reliable and can be trusted to do your part.

A few guidelines to follow are:

• Communicate regularly. Set a specific time to meet face-to-face, whether it be daily or weekly, and keep the appointment. Probably most important, do not ever shut the communication lines down; they should always be open at any time.

• Be specific about which topics and questions should and will be discussed, such as schedules, finances, personal values, household management, children, etc. You may want to only start with one or two topics in the beginning and work your way up. This really depends on your particular circumstances and how far gone the relationship is.

• Be honest and transparent. Discuss the bad right along with the good. Do not leave out or “sugarcoat” the details to save one’s feelings. Honesty is vital.

• Keep competency in mind. Can you really do what you are saying you can or what is being asked of you? If the difficult task is an essential one, explain the difficulty and first commit to only seeking out help; then move on from there. Take it in bite-size pieces. Do not commit to something you cannot readily do.

• At the end of the accountability session ask and answer the question: “Have you been truthful about everything we have discussed?” You are working to build trust, a key component, and sacred treasure, when taking the steps to marriage separation reconciliation.

In short, accountability is CPR for marriage: Communicating Personal Responsibility. Just as cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) can breathe life back into someone who has stopped breathing, reporting (or communicating personal responsibility) can breathe life back into your marriage.

If you are having trouble administering the CPR portion of your steps to marriage separation reconciliation, consider receiving outside guidance. Almost all marriages should and can be saved, including yours.

Note:

This article is Part 4 of 5.  Please click on the tag steps to marriage separation reconciliation for the full series.

Restructuring is a vital key in steps to marriage separation reconciliation. Restructuring is the plan of action you and your spouse will take to re-establish your marriage. You will need to make a plan, work it, revise it when necessary, then rinse and repeat.

Plan It

During this stage, communication is of utmost importance. Each party needs to be able to express their individual wants and needs while the other listens, not only with their ears, but with their heart as well. Perceived rights and wrongs are no longer of any consequence. It is time to empathize with your spouse’s feelings and bring the focus to the solutions rather than the problems.

Once everything has been aired, the two of you can then work together to find practical and constructive ways to resolve the issues and set you back on the path to reconciliation. Set up a brainstorm session when you both are able and have the time to really discuss and draw up the plan.

Talk about your beliefs and values. Determine what exactly it is you both want to accomplish. What steps do you need to take to get there? Ask each other if there are certain things you do that are particularly upsetting, and really listen to the responses without getting defensive. Are there solutions to these problem areas?

Now choose just two or three areas to work on. Depending on your situation, you may need to take on the biggest issues first or you might need to baby-step it with the small ones, especially if lack of trust is a factor.

Work It

Now it is time to put your plan into action. The old rule “say what you’ll do and do what you say” is very important here. Following this rule will help ensure you have a foundation of trust to build on. Just for good measure, whenever it’s possible go above and beyond what is expected and earn a few brownie points. While in this stage remember to expect the ups and downs, but be patient and persistent and eventually you’ll look back and see just how far you’ve come.

Revise It

From time to time sit down and do a check-up on the plan. If things are going well and moving along fairly smoothly, keep up the good work. If something isn’t working, try to find a new solution. Your action plan is not set in stone; if you need to make changes for it to be better, do so.

Rinse and Repeat

Once you’ve found a method that seems to work, keep working through each of your problems, making any necessary adjustments. In time you should have a much better, stronger, and deeper relationship with the connections you desired before your marriage separation.

Note:

This article is Part 3 of 5.  Please click on the tag steps to marriage separation reconciliation for the full series.

Steps to marriage separation reconciliation are important in rebuilding the love and trust ties that bind a couple in danger of filing for divorce. One factor in these steps is repentance. As defined at Wikipedia, “Repentance is a change of thought and action to correct a wrong and gain forgiveness from a person who is wronged.”

In order to reconcile a marriage, both individuals must be able and willing to recognize their fault in the dissolution of the marriage, whether it is large or small, whether it is a result of being on the offensive or defensive line. You must then be willing to take the necessary actions to rectify, or at least prevent, the same mistakes from occurring in the future. Three elements of the repentance factor in steps to marriage separation reconciliation are acknowledgment, remorse, and forgiveness.

Acknowledgment

Profess your specific wrongdoings (forgot about that important meeting, not forgetfulness) and do not make excuses for them; just simply own up to the offense and be willing to make amends. Show that you know how you have erred and are ready to change that behavior.

Remorse

Be open and honest about the shame and grief you feel for the hurt you have caused. At this stage of the game it is important for your spouse to be able to see that you understand the hurt that you have caused them, whether it was intentional or not, and are truly sorry for it.

Forgiveness

Say “I’m sorry” and ask for forgiveness. It may not come immediately, but knowing that you have done this much will help you heal from the pain you caused. Forgiveness has great healing power, not only for the one being forgiven, but the forgiver as well. Forgiving does not mean that your spouse is justifying or even accepting your actions, but it does mean that they are able to overlook your transgressions in order to restore the bond of love.

Note:

This article is Part 2 of 5.  Please click on the tag steps to marriage separation reconciliation for the full series.

If you and your spouse are going through a marital crisis and have separated, don’t despair. It is still possible to save your marriage. The steps to marriage separation reconciliation are based on the four R’s: Repentance, Restructuring, Reporting, and Restoration.

REPENTANCE

To repent is to feel regret or remorse for the misdeeds one has done. In order to reconcile a marriage, each party must be willing to recognize their fault in the dissolution of the marriage, whether it be large or small, whether it be a result of being on the offensive or defensive line. None are perfect and all have flaws. You must then be willing to take the necessary actions to rectify or at least prevent the same mistakes from occurring in the future.

RESTRUCTURING

Restructuring is the action plan you and your spouse will use to rebuild the marriage. The ability to communicate is vital in this step. Each party needs to be able to express what their needs and wants are and the other needs to listen, not only with their ears, but with their heart as well. Whether perceived wrongs or what you thought you were doing right is accurate or not is of no consequence; you must be able to empathize with your spouse’s feelings. Once everything has been aired, the two of you can then work together to find practical and constructive ways to resolve the issues.

REPORTING

Reporting is simply accountability. Accountability in a relationship is not to make you feel like big brother is always watching over you, but it is to build the trust and communication bonds between a couple. Being accountable to your spouse is not about being selfish, it is the act of putting their needs and desires first. Marriage is a two-way street in which you give and take, and when you give selflessly you are more apt to receive the same in return. Accountability just provides the honesty, openness, and assurance needed to rebuild the relationship and open the path to restoration.

RESTORATION

Restoration is the actual step of repairing or renewing your marriage. If you have moved through the other three steps to marriage separation reconciliation, then restoration should be much easier and the marriage may actually be better than in the beginning. You have begun a new relationship with your spouse in which you have better communication, more honesty, and a desire to please your mate.

If the communication lines are too far gone at this point, consider receiving outside guidance to help you work through the steps to marriage separation reconciliation. Almost all marriages should and can be saved. If you have the desire to save your marriage, it can be done.

Note:

This article is Part 1 of 5.  Please click on the tag steps to marriage separation reconciliation for the full series.